A ranch, a play, chicken and a movie

What do these things all have in common?? Well, they all had a part in my day yesterday. I was up at the ranch (Circle Square Ranch) yesterday, helping or being in the way, I don't know yet...lol. It was really nice, getting to go outdoors, play in the grass, and meet new people. I then came home yesterday evening and proceeded to have a nap. I didn't mean to have a nap, I was just going to watch arthur then hop into the shower, but I ended up falling asleep for an hour.

Ever notice sometimes when you have a nap you feel worse then before you had the nap. That was the kind of nap I had. I think something hadn't settled in my stomach I felt nauseous. Oh well, it went away....and I got ready to go....

I went and saw the Play "Tuesday's with Morrie" (yes, it's also a book) with Kelley, it was a beautiful play, the actors were absolutely great, I believed every minute of it! It also made me cry and laugh, you know it's good when you experience to different spectrums of emotions...lol. While there I saw a sign for another play which sounds devine....CHICAGO...Saint John Theatre Company is putting it on. I think it would be very fun to go see...Maybe I can convince Someone to go with me...lol

We then went and grabbed some food (chicken to be exact, plus some fruit to balance it out) and watched a movie...Gracie's Choice. I love this movie, I cry everytime I watch...I think it's because of Kristen Bell, she is a phenomenal actress, very believable as Gracie. I was going to explain the movie but I'm afraid to spoil it....here read the synopsis.

Anyway, I then got to bed fairly late...try 3 am, by the time I got home and settled into bed, I need to stop these late nights...I go back to working days tommorow, I need to be able to sleep tonight. Meh, sleep who needs it...wait I do.

Hopefully today turns out to be just as exciting as yesterday...nah...I boring day would suit me just fine.

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

I figured since this is what I changed my name to, I should dedicate a post to it for everyone to understand where it comes from.

I've been reading a book recently called "Captivating" and it talks a lot about a woman's soul and such. It's very poetic, but when it comes down to it the bible said it all first.

Sometimes, I think every woman...and man...everyone needs to be reminded that they are fearfully and wonderfully made. It's easy to look at yourself in the mirror and criticize what you see. Or if you make a mistake, become a little depressed because you didn't quite meet the standards. We all put expectations on ourselves to "try harder", "do better", "be the best you can be". We think we need to look a certain way, or act a certain way...I'm sorry though...I don't meet that mold. I am never going to be a size 2, I am never going to be out at the clubs, dating different guys, or even becoming a perfect little housewife who solves every problem, because that just is not me!!

But I don't have to worry about becoming something I'm not because I know that God made ME the way I am

Size 14
5'7"
size 9 feet
with brown hair
and blue eyes
a huge smile
a laugh that can sometimes sound like a Hyena
a girl who can be shy, but really loud at the same time
who loves kids
cries at the weirdest times
loves cartoons and disney movies
reads mysteries and romance books
is a little forgetful and late at times
Compassionate
will listen to you
is a shoulder to cry on
is not touchy touchy...but will give you a hug when it's needed
considers her friends a part of her family
loves to hang out with her family and friends....and watch a good movie
prays...especially when someone else needs it
loves to hear she is loved...
loves Jesus with all her heart
and loves others with that same heart

That's who I am...I'm sure there is much more to me, that I'm forgetting...lol. But that is the good, the bad, and the ugly for sure...It's still great to know that I'm fearfully and wonderfully made though!

Psalms 139

...I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well...

Looking back...Changes

Well, I changed the title of my blog, after all, I am no longer a Nursing STUDENT...I'm an actual nurse. Why do I have the sudden urge to want to cry?

Hmmm, why don't I answer my own question...wanting to cry, hmmm??

I think it comes from change, all these changes that are happening all at once. I was looking back and reading some of the entries from my journal and it seems that I have changed immensely. People in my life have changed to, some who were important in the past I barely talk to now, while others who I never knew till recently have become very important to me. It blows your mind on how much can change in 4 years. time goes by to quickly, part of me just wants to hold it, freeze time, and enjoy the moments that are happening now, and then another part of me wants to speed things up to see what other changes might happen.

I think I'm hitting this scared about change feeling because I'm finding being a Graduate Nurse, newly out of school makes me question myself. It's not that I don't like being out of school, because I do...I really do. making money and being able to pay off debt and support yourself is a wonderful previlage that I do not want to lose anytime soon. It's probably because my "safety net" is gone. I no longer have everyone looking over my sholder, the only people really that I'm accountable to is my self and my patient...please tell me you think that's scary too? Experts say that the one "line" a new nurse prays before he or she goes to work is "Please don't let me kill anyone today" Well so far, I have not killed anyone, and I pray I never will.

Thankfully though, I have a great support system behind me and beside me, the staff on my floor are great, any questions I have they are right there, if I need help they are more then willing to offer it. My parents are awesome ( can't wait to live on my own though, I think my parental relationship will be much better when I'm not living under the same...I was going to say roof, but by the end of the year, I still will be living under the same roof...but not the same living space...lol) my friends are fantastic, whenever I need a shoulder or an ear, or just a hug, they are great. And of course, I always have God...he never leaves or forsakes me. I'm trying hard to try and take time for Him, I think I was "too busy" while in school. I just didn't have my priorities straight. I believe I'm turning over a new stone...or leaf or something, maybe it's a tree!!

Anyway, I'll write again soon. It's kind of fun rereading some of the journal entries...gives me an insight into myself, I think I won't do it again anytime soon...It takes a lot of time!

First day finished

Well, there is one day down...and so many more to go, but it's the beginning of something wonderful and exciting. In case you didn't know I did my first day of PAID work today (like real pay, the pay of a Graduate Nurse) It really makes you feel like you are worth something. I had to fill out my health and dental...ooo and life insurance, if I died my parents wouldn't have anything to worry about. But then again they would miss my wonderful presence and no one should be deprieved of that...lol.

So my legs are still slightly sore from my workout on Friday Morning, I never knew muscles could be worked so hard just from an exercise. I have another session tommorow and I'm really hoping that I'm completely healed by that time. The chances of that is slim to none though.

I watched Alvin and the Chipmunks this evening, it brings back happy memories {Alvin}...hehehe, the movie was cute it made me smile. Perfect for kids, It's a little too kiddish though even for me! But it's enjoyable, especially listening to the different music and the way they would create it could be totally incredible.

That's it for now, I have another day of Orientation tomorrow, ergonomics...whoohoo...it should be interesting, it means I'm wearing jeans and sneakers tomorrow, being comfortable is my most important goal!

Orientation

Starting orientation tomorrow, it's so exciting. It's the first day of work, like real work. I get a real paycheck after two weeks. I can't believe it...I knew this day would come, I knew it, four years ago I knew this day was on the horizon, but it's here, it's tommorow, I will have to be responsible for myself and for my actions. It's an awe inspiring feeling. At the age of 22 I am going to have a degree, a full time job, and be a registered nurse. It's almost overwhelming.

Almost not a student anymore

I can't believe it, I have now finished Preceptorship, got the credit for it..woohoo! It's almost overwhelming, so exciting though. I start my new job within one week, Hospital Orientation, then orientation to the floor. What's even scarier, is my parents are now talking about redoing the basement, making it so I have a place of my own. It would be a dream, almost a dream that I shouldn't wish for because what if it doesn't come true. There is a lot of work to do downstairs...number one being to put in walls, then put in the bathroom, then get furniture and appliances, move out the oil stove, and then move in. But when it all comes down to it, I wish I could move in tommorow.



Things are happening so fast, so many changes are going to happen within the next year and that's absolutely amazing to think about. And then there will probably be even more changes over the next two years. I would like to go back to school and get my Nurse Practitioners, that would be another dream. So many dreams and ambitions, atleast I've accomplished One...I'm graduating from University!!!



The Plans for My apartment in the basement:

nearly finished

It's an odd, and wonderful feeling, being nearly finished. My preceptoship is nearly done...but I have a to do list the height of the eiffel tower!!

to Do:

Go to the gym (want to work out you know, so I can feel good in my dress)
Finish my evaluation
go tanning
Start video
Read a few good books
put together game for youth
attend pin diner
attend graduation

oh yeah...Most importat: Study for Giant test being written on June 4th!!

yes, that is my to do list, for the next few weeks, so even though I have put my time in working, and studying...I'm only nearly finished.