2006 is on it's way!

wow, guys, you probably are having a heartattack it's my second post and they are not month's apart. Well as my title says, 2006 is coming up, hard to believe, most definitely. There is a lot of things that can be hard to believe. Like you're age, Linny is turning 20, and than Kell will, than me, than Kyla, (a few boys turn 20 in between all that). I don't know I guess I thought when 2006 came I would feel more grown up, and honestly I don't feel any different. Anyway, it's not here yet, I still have two more days to go. Maybe I'll grow up within two days. It could happen.

Well since I did get my digital camera, I am now going to show you what I have been taking pictures of. MY DOG!!!







As well, I have some family photos from christmas day, and some from church christmas morning.







Well enjoy, I have to go babysit now, which really isn't babysitting, catch ya later. If I don't see ya, Have an awesome New Year's!!

christmas is OVER...

So I haven't died, or moved away, but it is difficult to find time to write in this thing. Lots have been happening. Every one is home right now, even though I've barely seen anyone, I think it has something to do with working, we are all growing up and when you have jobs, it can be difficult to coordinate times. Well, Christmas day was good though. Having the family together, enjoying each others company. I got my bro The first Season of Family Guy, my mom I got clothes from bet you can't guess, Reitman's, and I got my dad a spongebob pillow. Yes I did say Spongebob. My father and brother are obsessed with this character:






Now for the most exciting thing, I got a digital camera for christmas. I love it. Now I will be able to post much more pictures, and what not's from my daily life. It will especially be useful when I go to New York. Oh for those of you who don't know, I'm going to New York for a missions trip over March Break. This will be an awesome experience. I am a little scared. But I won't get into too much details.

Well, that's about it right now, hopefully I'll catch you up on what has been happening in my life, have a nice day. See ya!

Jocelyn

AH! Ow, *Tears* Gasp!

I got my FLU shot!! :(

Have I ever told you I don't like being pricked by a neddle, and I don't like IM's the most. Give me an SC any day over an IM needle. But than any needle is like torure for me. It's not like I'm so afraid and paranoid that I won't get them, it just takes more courage to get them than I would like. You would think if I see them given often enough that they wouldn't bother me. Well no, they totally make my stomach turn. I really picked a profession didn't I??

You know what, I think it's time that I overcame some of my fears. But which one to start with?? The spider thing, nah, those are creepy. The lightening thing, we could try, but I can't promise I won't vomit. The needle thing, what, are you going to continuously stick me with needles. NO THANK YOU!! Well it seems my fears are sticking around for quite some time. Unless miraculously I start enjoying pain.

Anyone got any suggestions as to how to overcome Fears??

OOO

Well after Kyla did her thing I thought I would have fun going though the quizzes, see if there was anything interesting, and look what I found.

Which Disney Princess Are You? by Priness_VLo
Name
Age
You are	Cinderella
Your Motto	I believe in Happy Endings
Quiz created with MemeGen!

aw, this baby is over a year old

I was gong back and I realized this little blog of mine has bee nin effect for over a year. I would like you to take notice that my very first blog was actually written on a monday with nothing interesting in it. It was just expalining about my day.

Over the year, this blog has becaome a place to vent, to sing, and to laugh about myself and the stupid things I do. Sometimes I know I forget all about writing an entry, but well, can you blame me, I know some of you have difficulties as well. Sometimes I forget to write for an entire month, like the month of october, I think I posted like once. Sorry aobut that.

Well, nothing's new today. I'm actually thinking I will do homework today. oh and later I may even dedicate a post to Edmund. Long story I'll explain later.

Have a good weekend.

Jocelyn

100 things about Me

Ok I'm starting it, when it will actually be done I have no clue. But atleast I started.

1. There is one thing that I believe with all my heart. That Jesus Christ is the son of God and that he died and rose again. And he did all of this so that I wouldn't be seperated from him because of my sin.

2. I was a giant keener in sunday school. I would have every single memory verse memorized, I would know all the books of the bible, and I would always win the bible sword drills. Some kids really didn't like me during this stage in my life.

3. I still love doing little kid things. ie: watching cartoons, disney movies, coloring, or even just doing a little art project.

4. I love gilmore girls yet I'm very confused as to how the story plays out because I watch it daily on many different channels.

5. I can't handle pain, I'm a huge wimp. I will complain for hours about little cuts and scraps.

6. I"m an extremely messy person. I do not organize anything. The only time things are organized is if I beg Lindsay to do it for me. So my room is continually messy, until I finally give in and clean it.

7. I will eat anything and everything sweet, especially ice cream. I have even had ice cream for Breakfast.

8. I would absolutely love to redecorate my room. Even though I still love Teddy Bears, I think it is time for a change. What I would really like to have is a lavender color walls with maybe a really funky design.

9. I get way to involved in tv, movies or even books. I get so worked up sometimes I have even thrown a book across my room. I also yell at the characters in a movie telling them to stop what they're doing. Or I tell them someone is coming up behind them. yeah I know, they can't hear me.

10. I have always wished I had violet eyes ever since I read my favorite book The Hawk and the Jewel by Lori Wick. Sunny the heroine has violet eyes.

11. I am a whole lot like my mother, we even laugh the same. That's why when we fight we go all out, because it's like fighting with yourself.

12. I cannot wait until I get to see a musical on Broadway. I really want to see Wicked and Hairspray.

13. Reality Shows do not entertain me, except maybe American Idol/Canadian Idol, even though this year I didn't watch. I think I might have watched two or three episodes and that's it.

14. Even though I love nursing, I would do anything to be able to get out of all the work I have to do.

15. Give me a good book, a nice cozy corner, and some sun any day, over a dark movie theatre or even tv.

16. When I was a child, one of my best friends was my next door neighbor. We would sit in her front yard and play Barbies all day long. When she turned 7 or 8 she got cancer. She was tube fed and I remember being there one time when she had to eat. She did a lot of things at home. I was her one friend that she could just be a kid around.

17. I tend to wonder sometimes what happened to all my friends that I had in Fredericton. Most would be graduated from school now, and off doing different things with their life. I like to imagine that they all found a life they were happy with.

18. I love romance, I love to read about it, I like to hear about it from my friends, I like a good romantic movie, you knkow where the girl and guy fall in love and live happily ever after.

19. Even though I love romance, I hate PDA. I would prefer cuddling on my own couch than in the middle of the hall way. Even than cuddling is not something I do UNLESS it is with the right person.

20. When it is my time to have a pet of my very own, I want a toy poodle. Black, male, and I will name him Pepsi. I'll call him Pep for short.

21. My favorite author is Lori Wick. I have read most everything she has written. Except the really new books. She has such an art for the perfect amount of romance and danger in her books. Plus she has heroines in her books, you know strong independent women who fall in love. I really admire those characters.

22. I have stayed up all night because I was reading a book and did not want to put it down. I done it more than once and have gone to school the next morning.

23. I used to have a paper route when I was a kid. I actually made a lot of money from it. People liked me and gave me tips. There was only one house that didn't like me. Well the people liked me, but their German Shepard wanted to have me for lunch. He actually di d get a few good bites.

24. I've been bitten twice by a dog, refer to #23. Once in the back of the ankle, he caught me when I was running away from him. The second time, I was standing beside his owner and he clamped down on my forearm. That one left a mark.

25. I hate confrontation. If I have to fight for something I will avoid it at all costs. For instance, I didn't want to quit my job because I was scared to get in a "discussion" with my boss.

26. Even though I'm supposedly "trained" in stock at work. I have never had to unpack stock.

27. Deep, Deep down, I'd give anything to work with children for the rest of my life. And realistically I can do it being a nurse. But I would love to be a children's pastor. Showing kids the love of God is an amazing previlage. Not saying I won't still do that...we'll just have to wait and see.

28. I am very protective of my brother. Yes sometimes it seems that I hate him, but that is the furthest from the truth. If my brother needed me for something, I would drop everything for him. And if anyone tried to mess with him. I would not be happy.

29. One time I was riding my bike and fell. I was atleast a street away from my house. A neighbor found me and carried me home. My knee and leg was completely torn up. I still have the scar from it. I have no clue who this neighbor was, all I remember is that he had black hair.

30. I love the smell of pineapple, but I hate the taste of it.

31. I wish I could sing perfect harmony to different songs I've heard. It'd make life so much easier, and a lot more fun.

32. I was never put into dance classes because older woman in the church said it was sinful and told my mother not to do it.

33. I always seem to get cuts and scrapes on my hands and fingers. I usually don't damage anything else. If I'm going to bleed it will be from my hands...somewhere on them.

34. I am really bad at budgeting money. I really hope my husbands good at it.

35. I want to be Cinderella. Well kind of, I want a happily ever after, with a giant wedding and a huge wedding dress like hers. Which is why I want a giant church wedding.

36. I f I were to ever get a tattoo, I would put a cross somewhere on my body, it's be very tiny, but it would be there.

37. When I was a kid I told my mom I wouldn't to be a singer, and she said no that's not very realistic. Yeah that was the day I stopped wanting to be a singer.

38. I have always wanted to play piano, or take guitar lessons or something musical, but when I was a kid I got to do swimming lessons.

39. Sometimes I would rather be home, curled up in my bed than at a party with a lot of people.

40. I tend to not say anything, I keep my mouth shut...when I'm hurt or upset. I will not say a word or cry, until I'm away from everyone, and safe in my own bedroom.

41. The first concert I ever saw was Petra. We drove down to bangor to visit friends, and see Petra.

42. I went to summer camp all my life. Actually I went to bible camp all my life and I loved it!

43. Oddly enough Purple has always been my favorite color.

44. I love history, but I would never want to make a career out of it. I just think it's interesting.

45. I got my first period and my first boyfriend the same week, while at #42

46. The longest friend I've had so far, is Lindsay. (Timewise people)

47. I have a new appreciation for christian music. It's very uplifting, and it's a lot of fun and renewing to worship the Lord through song.

48. I want to travel to exotic places, see the ruins and visit Dublin Ireland. Probably because of #44

49. I've always had this fixation on Texas. Maybe I want to marry a cowboy and I've always known Texas has ranches, so that's where I'm going to meet a cowboy.

50. I secretly wish I could be a writer. I want to write my own books, or atleast a short story. So far I've written about a young woman working in a children's orphanage. another young woman working as a children's pastor. (guess where the inspiration came for this one) and the lastest one, is a young woman dealing with the fact that she was rapped, her story and the people around her. Eventually I'd like to write a story about a nurse and the things and adventures she see's within her day.

51. I was actually very afraid of the dark when I was younger.

52. Now, what I'm scared of, are scary movies, giant spiders in my shower, and Lightening.

53. I am a massive procrastinator. I always put off everything. I always think I have time for it later. And than when later comes, I get into quite a pickle.

54. I would rather sleep in my parents bed for a nap rather than my own bed. When I'm in the house by myself I always sleep in their bed.

55. My favorite Hockey team is the Montreal Canadians, only because they were my grandfathers favorite and than my fathers, I just copied them. And than it just kind of stuck. I cheer for them no matter what, even if they are being slaughtered.

56. I used to have a fort in my backyard in Fredericton. Really it was just a little secluded area between my house and Sarah's (#16). We kept everything hidden in there. We put Canada flag stickers all over the trees and the fence. We thought it was the coolest place ever.

57. Some of my happiest times, have been at my grandmother's cottage. It's where family got together, it's where we shared our lives during the summers. It was the only time we actually could see each other. Except for Holiday's obviously.

58. I didn't think I was ever going to get my liscense until I parallel parked on my very first try.

59. My favorite cereal is Cinnamon Toast Crunch, but I eat Frosted Flakes more often.

60. I love hearing really old beautiful hymns sung in harmony. Like "It is Well with my soul"

61. The first christmas spectacular that I actually did something in, I was an angel and I had to sing away in a manger all by myself.

62. My favorite Disney movie is Mulan. I even really like Mulan 2.

63. I'm actually kind of comfortable with death. Other people's death not my own, or families, or friends.

64. Singing at the top of my lungs in the shower. Sometimes when no one else is in the house, I'll sing at the top of my lungs than too.

65. I think showing to much cleavage/skin is tacky. And just not respectful of yourself. When I was younger I don't think I knew this rule, as some of you may know my cleavage has a mind of its own.

66. I believe their are good and evil spirits. And if you invite any spirit through witch craft, fortune tellers, ,or even a Ouiji board, you're asking for trouble.

67. I like palying with Playdough. I could spend hours just making stuff. I would try to make myself a little town.

68. I would love to have 8 or 9 children. But physically I don't think I would want to do that. Refer back to #5

69. The things that gross me out, are not the usual. You would think feces, urine, vomit, and the like would gross me out. But really I hate phlegm. IT's just gross.

70. I know how to properly give a suppository.

71. I wish that I could be a guest character on 7th Heaven, because it is my favorite show. I loved it growing up in my teen years, and I love it even more now. It's values and message are good, and wholesome. My kind of show.

72. I've sang more point of grace songs for a special in church than all the others put together.

73. The only big meal that I've cooked and that I really know how to cook was Chicken, in cream of mushroom sauce, with stuffing, herb and garlic potatoes, corn, carrots and more veggies. It was quite complicated, but I did it!!

74. Ever since I can remember I have been going to church. There is even a picture of mom pregnant with me in a church directory.

75. Right abouve my left eye I have a scar. Well really it's an indent. I ran into the corner of a TV. My mother thought I had took my eye out there was so much blood. It was one of those floor tv's that would be about the height of a three year old.

76. I can be very forgetful, for instance the first time I published this I forgot 76.

77. It's my fault my brother broke his arm when he was four. My friends and I were running down the stairs to get away from him. And he came tumbling after. It was one of the scariest moments of my life cause I can remember looking back and seeing him fall, and crumble at the bottom of the stairs crying and screaming. We had to wait forever at the hospital because they couldn't find the break. They X-rayed his arm three times. They finally showed us where he had three little fracture breaks in his wrist.

78. My first job was teaching swimming lessons at the age of 15. Which makes sense because of #38.

79. My eyes are blue, but if I'm angry, or upset they turn more gray.

80. I am really bad at keeping in touch. A lot of the time I would rather just stay at home, turn off my phone and read a book.

81. I have a really weird sense of humor. I can laugh at absolutely nothing, or at a joke. But than I can't get all jokes so I usually laugh at nothing.

82. I used to have a slip an' slide when I was a kid. It was my favorite toy.

83. One of the best times of my life was my grade 12 year in high School. Probably because it was just so fun. I wouldn't go back to it, but I wouldn't change any of it either.

84. My father, brother and I all have the same sense of humor. While we were watching Bruce Almighty (mom was there too). Mike, dad, and I, we all laughed at the exact same times, yet mom wouldn't laugh at all, or she would laugh when the rest of us didn't find anything funny.

85. I need to have painted toe nails during the summer. Unpainted toe nails look gross.

86. The best thing to ever happen to me, is when we got our third vehicle and that meant I wouldn't have to stay at the University for hours upon hours doing nothing.

87. My most embarassing moment involves flashing my youth group.

88. Sometimes I wish I could read people's thoughts. Wouldn't it be great to REALLY know what people thought about you're new haircut.

89. In the neighbor hood that I lived at in Fredericton, there was a river that was beside our dead end. One side of the road was houses, the other was a steep hill, than this river. When I delivered papers, I was afraid that this alligator man would come out of the river and eat me.

90. My favorite side dish is coleslaw. I would get a platter from deluxe just so I could have the coleslaw. Dad as well, whenever we went out to eat would give me his coleslaw.

91. I love the game of tetris. I have a little hand held game that I play nightly, and I have favorite sites saved on my computer of tetris games I like to play.

92. I have come to really appreciate The Lord of The Ring Series. I don't care if I'm hopping on the band wagon, I love those movies.

93. I might seem quite tough, but deep down I can be very girly.

94. My brother and I have all out war in the middle of our living room. We physically fight until someone calls a truce. For years I always won, but lately I've been losing a lot.

95. I am not a morning person, I would rather stay up all night and sleep in, rather than go to bed early and get up early.

96. I have no idea when I decided I wanted to be a nurse, I just know that that's what I was supposed to do. I haven't regereted it yet.

97. My father is the one who named me, and mom came up with my middle name, maybe she thought I'd be musical. I guess she was kind of right, melody doesn't mean I have to be good at it.

98. I love running outside during a summer hailstorm. I did it once when I was a kid in my bathing suit. We were actually playing with #82. We ran around and collected as many ice pellets as we could and put them in our freezer.

99. My favorite bible verse is Matthew 20:28. I think it represents why I want to be a nurse.

100. I'm really not that complicated, yes I have big dreams, and hopes, but I don't doubt that most of my dreams will come true if not all of them.

Well that's me. Yes there is probably many more, but it took me three days to come up with 100, if I had to do anymore I think I would have a brain freeze. Good luck to any of you who try this.

Where to go, what to do??

I was talking about this with Lindsay earlier, about the fact that I want to move out, but I won't move out till I have graduated. And even then I probably will wait until I really move. Like when I move to Texas. What I'm thinking I'll do is once I've graduated I can only work as a graduated nurse until I get my RN exam mark back but once I get that I will apply for a job, where ever I want to go. And right now I would like to go to Texas. I small community I think or maybe a larger one. I don't know I'll have to wait and see what's out there. I will move clear across the continent from my parents house. There will be no looking back for me. Sure I may get homesick but I'll deal. You never know who you'll meet when you start traveling. I'll be ready at least I hope I'll be. I 'll probably be calling home often. To my friends and my parents because well that's the girl I am, but I think I'll enjoy the challenge.

Well I need to continue studying...TTFN

Jocelyn

No, I have not fallen off the face of the EARTH

Hello,
It's me from the world of Jocelyn, letting you know I am still alive. Lots has happened since the last time I blogged. What that all is I have no clue. But I do have a few main points. Which include Youth Convention-Thanksgiving weekend, Nursing Society party, and probably something else. I'll think of it while I'm writing.

Well Youth Convention was a blast, I got to see (concerts I mean) Joy Williams, bought her CD. As well as Salvador, and Tree63 which was a real treat. I also saw Reuban Morgan. We stayed in a hotel, that was cool. We got to hang out, the GIRLZ! Woot Woot! It was really nice. I saw people I had not seen in a while. Like Pastor Brad, who has a new baby girl. Very exciting. It seems everyone is having babies now a days. Well obviously not everyone. But quite a few. Plus there are a lot of marriages going on to. Maybe it's just the age I'm at. Where friends and people closer to my age are getting married and having babies. My cousin Matthieu is getting married next year. My other cousin Sherry had her second baby, and my aunt had little Becca. Who I got to see in the hospital the say after she was born. She was so small! Ok enough talk about babies.

*****Just for your information*****This is a continuation blog that I started a week ago*******


Oh speaking of babies, I saw little Amy for the first time on Saunday, she is absolutely gorgeous. She is very precious.

Well you might be asking how is she possibly being able to write since she hasn't in like FOREVER! Well I got a class cancelled. My instructor is sick, sadly I have to work tonight so I can't even go home. I get to work on halloween, it should be fun. It's funny after today we will start talking about Christams. Which I'm excited for, and can't believe it is coming up so fast. Before I know it, I will be finished the year. I don't want next semester to go by really fast though, I get to go to the maternity ward, I'm very excited for that. I'm most excited for Pediactric ward, but I can be patient for that because I need to learn more before I'm really comfortable there.

Ok now to talk about Thanksgiving, even though that was quite a few weeks ago. I had a lot of fun. I really enjoyed watching Crash. That was quite an interesting movie. I'm little disappointed with the nudity scenes, I do not think they needed to be in the movie at all. Sorry I know they were trying to get a point across but still!! I've been being more careful with the movies I watch now. Why subject myself to things that are of sin. It's just not good for me.

ooo, now onto the nursing society party...all you really need to know is that it was a total waste of my time and my efforts. Hopefully I'll be able to get things back on track. Enough about nursing society it gets me to frustrated to even talk about.

oh, but I will tell you about the books I've recently read. I'm a real book freak lately I really like them, hard to believe huh?? I'm in the middle of reading Dee Henderson's The Negotiator. It'a about a woman who's a negotiator who works really high profile cases and in one case she works it suddenly gets more personal than it should, and someone is seemingly after her. Therefore she must figure out who's after and why they are bringing up her past. It's very GOOD. I've read it before but I really honestly do not remember what happens in it.

well I don't have anything else to say, I might as well go find a comfy spot and read my book. Wish there was a couch around here somewhere?? hmm, maybe I could sneak into the skills lab and lay in one of the hospital beds. nah!

Catch you later!

Last Day of September

Well, the last day of september has become a very frazzled day. I have many things to do, and the people I need to help me do it are no where in site! I needed to get the money for tommorow's night "meet and greet" @ Tapps tommorow night, and I can't get a hold of the vp of finance. I emailed him. And he never emailed me back, so I emailed him again, and again. He's probably thinking I'm some sort of maniac. I've gone to his office like 8 thousand times, and he's never there. I waited two hours for him yesterday. I'm getting a little frustrated. WE might have to cancel our thing tommorow especially if I can't get the money. We'll now I'm off to see if I can catch him in his office. Check you later.

Ok gag me with a spoon

I really don't think I should write this blog. But I'm going to anyway! If I get yelled at well, maybe i deserve it. Well Iwas just meandering around on the blogs seeing what everyone was up to, and well I stumbled onto Kyla's blog. Which was really interesting. I do realize her and Bryan are still dating. Which is fabulous. I than accidently stumbled onto Bryan's blog. And this could be my single state speaking and the fact that it's one of my bestest friends (who I miss very much) and a guy I dated. But ew. I love you both but seperately. Maybe I just don't understand this relationship you have found. Making it through the odds of a long distance relationship. It's quite something.

I do have one questions though, How do you know you're in love? What defines this as love over strong feelings of like or even lust. What makes this relationship different?

In the future I must remind myself to skip over Bryan's blog. And when I'm reading Kyla's to skip over any reference to Bryan except maybe in a platonic way. lol. Yup that way I won't be grossed out. Now don't either of you get mad about this. My blog is for my thoughts, and I just thought you should know that I'm slightly sickened. But as I said before, this could be my very single state speaking. Man, Edmund and Kelley sicken me sometimes, but at other times I think it's cute. I don't know if I can get to the point where Kyla and Bryan are cute. It still just doesn't click in my mind. But I still wish you two the best of luck, and I wish anyone else who reads this and is in a relationship, Good Luck. As well to those who are in the same boat as me, God has someone for us, and we just have to be patient until He decides you are ready for this relationship.

comment spam

This is just to let you all know, that I've made my site comments unavailable except to registered users. So if you want to let me know what you think you need to have a blog. Ok. Love you guys.

NO work...tonight...Yay!

Monday, the start of a new school week, the start of well, more work, and the start of stress. Yay!! I am actually happy that I do not have to work tonight. I called in and they were like, nope, sorry go home. Ha I'm not sorry I have to go home. After all, I did have a busy weekend so I really didn't do anything. Now to explain what my weekend was like It was fun, exhausting, and extremely exciting.

It was fun, because I had people over Friday night, Lin, Kell, Ricky, and Andrew. We watched The longest yard with Adam Sandler. It was a very good movie. So you know how much I love you guys so of course hanging out with you is fun.

It was exhausting cause I worked Sat, 12 to 6. (ever notice how when you have a shift it actually takes up more time than the shift says because of travel time and what not. So really work was from 11:30 to 6:30.) Than I did homework. Yes, the wonderful thing I call Homework. AH!!

Than sunday, I did more homework, my journal on Chronic illness. Weekly thing, it's really interesting. Than I went to work again, Now I was only supposed to be at work till four that way I could go home and eat than go to the Petra concert. Well Nathan Cameron came to pick me up and my boss told Kelley that I was working and couldn't come yet. In a not so very nice voice. Yay so I didn't get to eat, and we were a little late getting there. But that was fine.

ooo did I mention I saw Petra last night. I was volunteering at the concert, I sold CD's for one of their opening bands. I than got to meet each of the bands, get a free CD and get Dad's B-day present signed (CD). As well as get Pictures with me and John Schlitt. IT was SO cool. My dad had left early so I had asked John (lead singer of Petra) If I called him would he say Hi, and he did. It was so cool. For those of you who don't know, Petra is my father's favorite band. So this was a pretty cool night for him.

Well than after everything was done we went and ate at Wendy's...I was straved. It was really a great night that will forever stay in my mind.

Me again!!

I was going to say it's Jocelyn again or something like that in my title but than I thought for a minute and realized who else would be posting. duh!

So Assignment's and Homework is lovely isn't it? It seems to just keep going, and going for forever and a day. We're talking about Probablility in stats tommorow. Yay!! (that is a very sarcastic yay for those who do not know me). I am excited about clinical on thursday though. That is going to be awesome. Or atleast I hope it will be. I have kind of an old fanshioned instructor and I've heard some interesting things from the other students. So hopefully it weill go well. I wonder though because of working at the summer if she'll actually let me be and not like take over like she did with the other students. Cause you know clinical is all about learning by doing. Perfecting skills you've done in the lab setting on actual patients. Don't worry we do know what we are doing...Most of the time.

Well do you want to know what happened with my not being able to quit. A few all ready know this story. Well SAturday I was going to put in my notice. Which meant I could have more time for me or go look for another job in a nursing home or something. WELL, I told my boss I wanted to talk to her after my shift was over. And she was like why? But of course I didn't want to tell her right there so I asked her to wait. Where she asked, "is it good or bad?" Well I wasn't going to lie.

Jocelyn: You're going to think it's bad

My boss: You're leaving us?

What exactly would you say to that. Well I was honest told her yes. Than she wouldn't bring it up again. Until we were in front of other people. She wanted me to tell Manda (the manager trainee) What my plans were and she grilled me as to why?? I really didn't have a definite answer for her, And I was in front of other people I didn't want to give an answer. Well we let it drop. Than Darlene (my boss) and I talked after my shift was done.

Darlene: Jocelyn, please don't go, we'll cut back your hours, make it better for your schedule. One sat. and two week nights or something. Please Jocelyn you're a really good worker and I would hate to lose you.

Jocelyn: Let me think it over in the next two weeks and I'll get back to you.

So this means that I can wither stay or go, If I get thanksgiving weekend off like I requested I may not quite for a month or two or maybe not till after december. OR I can go out looking now for a job in a nursing home. The only thing with working at a nursing home is that they usually have you scheduled both Saturday and Sunday 12 hour days. I want sunday's off to go to church. I know I have peace about staying at Reitman's for now. But Maybe in a few weeks circumstances will change. We'll see what happens.

I'll keep you updated.

Power has been flickering here so I better go, before the power goes out or something.
God Bless

Hello...hello...heeee...lllllll...oooooo

Yes I am still alive for those of you who thought I was gone. I am still here. I think I didn't update my blog because I was just bored and my life is not that interesting so I felt like there was nothing to tell.

Well there still is nothing much to tell, my life is pretty much the same. I'm in the second year of University. I am a Sophomore. Yay for me. I feel like I actually know something, I have a year behind. That doesn't not mean I am ready to get out there and start being a full time nurse. HA! that's a laugh and a half. But I know SOMETHING and that counts.

Well I tried to quit my job on Saturday, it didn't work to well I'll expalin all later. It was very WEIRD!

ooo, Sunday was fun!! No it was Awesome, no it was FANTASTIC!! We finally got to present puppetmaster to the church congregation. Funny story while we were practicing I was doing my falls, and the last time we did it. I smashed my knee into chairs. OUCH! It hurt, just a little bit. Than the actual performance was sunday morning, it went really well, I was actually very proud of all the youth who participated in the service. God got the Glory in that one cause I have no idea how it all came together. I found this morning when I woke up my hip and my shoulder are in a bit of pain. Guess what that is from.

Well this week has been going great. I feel renewed and so filled with peace. I feel as if God and I are on talking terms again. I'm trying and working at being a better christian and letting my faith shine through. Even today at work. I got an opportunity to express my faith, not so much talk about it or witness to anyone, just letting people know I'm a christian and it's important for me to go to church and what not.

Well I have chores to do, and I have some things to read. Sorry it took me so long to write on my blog again. I know you guys understand. Miss all of you Tons! God Bless

Jocelyn

I'm posting see...

So I'm writing this while i dry my hair, so I'm only using one hand. it's actually quite difficult! It's so much slower too. It's been two minutes and I've only typed 2 lines. yeah back to two hands.

Well as some of you may know tonight is my last night working at the hospital. I'm done for the summer. I still have the Reitman's job, whether I'll keep that for the year or not has not been decided yet. BUT we do now have a third vehicle which means I'll have something to drive me to and from school. Yay!

Dolly Parton is coming up fast. Literally this weekend. Sunday night Woohoo. I'm going to have to get some huge Dolly listening party happening before I go.

And than this friday is the Youth Commitee retreat...don't get me started on that...I'll explain later. I'm not so worried anymore, but I'll have to think some things through. Sorry Kell for blasting off in your ear. I didn't mean too. I know there's no excuse but I'm tired, I never get the best sleep of my life after working a night shift. but that's what I'm off to do again, another night shift.

Hope You Have a great night. Catch you later.

Things in Series...

Now you may say...what kind of title is that. Well just what it says. I want things in series. I've been thinking about the different things I could get once I have a steady income coming in. For instance once I graduate and get a job as a nurse. Yay! I can buy my list if things I want and have never gotten because I would probably have to order them over the internet and than use a visa or some other credit card. So here is my list:

1) The 7th Heaven series--Meaning once it finishes airing I want all the seasons on DVD, but right now all they have out is the first and second season.

2) The Xena Warrior Princess series--Don't laugh, I watched these and I liked them. Girl power come on. Atleast this one has all six seasons on DVD. The final total for getting this series will be unreal but that's why I'm waiting till I have a job.

3)Any Lori Wick Series--I love her books, LOVE them! She has many, many books, and a lot of them are series. Like the Rocky Mountain Memories, The Yellow Rose Trilogy, The kensington chronicles series, which I have, but I want them all.

4) Now this may seem weird but I want all the For Better or For Worse Books. This is a comic and for the past few years I have been keeping up with what is happening with the comic, but it's not enough. I want to go back...Way Way back. So that means getting the compilation books of all the strips.

5)I would like to get the rest of the Point of Grace Cd's that I don't have all ready. It's only four cd's. But Lindsay will understand you keep count of what you don't have in you collection as well as what you do. I'm only missing The christmas album, Girls of Grace, I choose you album, and I would like to have Steady on, in Cd form rather than the tape form that I have.

6) One last item, I think it would be cool to have the Dr.Quinn Medecine Woman series on DVD. I'm not sure if I would pay anything to get it, but if there were good deals I think it would be something I'd be interested in.

Well I know I seem selfish and material minded but in all honesty they are just things, if I never get them it won't be the end of my life. I will carry on. I just think they would be fun to have, to watch or read whenever I wanted to. Now where I would put all these "things" I want, I have no clue.

It's Late

Well it is past midnight and I am working tommorow morning, BUT I'm not tired. I think it has something to do with my three hour nap this afternoon. Atleast I don't have to get up at like 6 am tommorow or else I would be soooo tired! :) Not like I'm all ready doing that. Funny story my alarm didn't go off this morning and I wake up from the phone ringing. I was all ready a fifteen minutes late for my shift at Reitman's. Yeah, got ready in Five minutes and got there in ten minutes. That was the fastest I've ever gotten ready for work in my LIFE! Well yeah my boos wasn't to happy but she wasn't stark raving mad either. ooo and I found out today for sure that my boss the one that "left" (which means she was asked to leave) was going to fire me...for what you might asK?? My bad work, my temper tantrums, no, for my lack of enthusiasm. Explain that to your next employer. But in reality she wanted to let me go because I had gotten a second job and she was thinking it was paying a toll on me. Which in some way it was because she was scheduling me for shifts RIGHT after doing a night shift...Your enthusiasm would be low to if you had gotten two hours sleep.

yup, and you may ask me what am I still doing at this store who won't let me have August 26, and 27 off so I can go camping with the Youth Commitee...I honestly don't know why??

So this week I'm pretty busy I work Monday and Tuesday full days at Reitman's and than I drop off the face of the earth from Wed to Sat because I'm doing my hospital shifts. So Kyla if you want to see me before you go...well I'll book Tuesday night for you!!

It seems everyone has come home this week, Kell's home, Kyla's home, um, did anyone else go away, oh yeah Ryan comes home on the 14th. Yeah...I'll be sleeping that day.

I don't think there's anything else that needs to be said...ooo this may be only interesting to the girls. I finally have the complete set of Lori Wick books the Kensington Chronicles. Excitement!!! they are so pretty, It has all the new covers and everything, I'm so happy. Now my next book collection to get is the O'Malley series by Dee Henderson, that may take a little time but I could always buy the TWO books that has all six novels in it, The would only be 50 dollars out of my pocket which is a pretty good price for 6 books. I don't know what do you think girls??

oh, Kell I've been looking at the Redemption series of Karen Kingsbury and I now think I"m interested. (that's the Baxter family right??). I don't know maybe we could do a book exchange/borrow. You know what I mean. Well once you get them back from Laura that is. :) Well People's it is now very late, and whether that means I'll be able to sleep or not is a very good question?

Wish me Luck this week, hopefully I won't break down with exhaustion!

*WARNING*

This Blog may be depressing!

Hey I just thaought I would warn you. (Sorry for anyone who checks this regularily I haven't been updating) But if you do check it regularily you know I haven't been writing because my jobs keep me so busy and tired all I do is go to work and than go to sleep. To get out to Nick's on Sunday night was well...a miracle.

Now for the reason I wanted to write this: A woman In my unit died today. This is officailly my third death which doesn't sound to bad considering some nurses have worked in paliative care for many many years. But with every death it's hard. But I think this one was really sad because she was younger she was only 50 years old. Her youngest child was only 17. I don't want to imagine what life will be like for that child. It's something I don't like thinking about because I'm too close to the situation. I really don't know If I feel sad, or if I feel nothing at all and I think it would be worse to feel nothing at all, but you do have to put a block up to protect yourself. But you still need to feel, because once you become heartless I don't think you're human anymore, and I never want to be a heartless nurse I care about my patients. Which is why I need to put that block up so I don't get hurt every single time one of them dies.

Well we are anticipating a very busy and emotional weak on the unit. There is currently four patients "actively dying" (nursing term that sounds disgusting but it's actually used) yeah they are going to go one after the other and when that happens it can get really hard emotionally especially for the nurses. You don't really have proper time to grieve and then all of a sudden another one goes.

yeah so that's what it's kind of like working in a place where your patients know they are dying. yeah I feel like I'm loosing my senses half the time.

It is August case you missed the month change. Meaning September is coming up fast, and I have no clue as to what to do about that...that's just a looming cloud right over my head. I'm excited but TERRIFIED! I shouldn't be as scared as I was last year, which in reality I'm not, I'm really not that scared...

that's all for now folks, send me an email every now and than...maybe I'll actually feel like someone cares...oh yeah thanks for the phone call Lin, sorry I wasn't here to answer it!! ;)

Conversations with Friends...

In a span of a day, you can have many conversations. Some conversations can be extremely memorable others are just fleating moments. And surprisingly the most memorable things in a conversation are not even said.

This could be a simple hug, a smile, or even not saying anything when you really, really want to. The art of conversation is not in what you say but in how you say it.

Ok i'm done with the philosophical portion of this blog. I was talking to Lin today and she said that I should put a link to my second Journal...Well there is a link to me other journal. It's called Second Page. So if you click on that you shall find my other thingy. Sorry is this confuses any of you. Some days I might type in one or the other. It makes it fun for you guys...which one will she choose next. Actually I wanted the other journal so I could upload pictures. And once I get my digital camara (which will be my end of summer purchase) I'm hoping to post them there.

Well I have to go to sleep...I may be out of commission for a few days. Tommorow I work all day than *hopefully* (cross your fingers) I'm going to Upper clements park on Tuesday. I am going to have so much fun!!

Well I'll tell you all about it on Wednesday.

Pallitive Care...interesting...

Well, as some of you may know, I am working at the hospital and I am working on 3BN the pallitive care unit, and in case you didn't know "that's where people go when they are really sick and dying".

I've learned a lot from just being there two weeks. And I'm happy I'm there. Well last week I got to experience two deaths. Both were during evening shifts. If you ask me how I felt about that, I have no idea. It's just weird. Doing mortuary care is weird, everything about taking care of someone who has died is weird, yet I understand it. You treat the body with the same dignity and care that you would if they were alive. Something I find really cute is the nurses while doing mortuary care will reminess about different things that the patient did while on the floor. Different things they said. It's cool, and being an outsider I notice this, but I bet none of the other nurses would, because they all do it. I think of it as their way of greiving for the patient.

so that's enough about dying let's move on to more interesting and funny things like POOP! Yes that is much more interesting. Well today I worked only from 7:30 to 3:30 but that's enough time to get "dirty".
Well I was in a patient's room with Heidi a nurse she's 24 graduated last year from the BN course and we were cleaning up a patient. You know bedbath, mosturizing, pericare. The fun stuff. Well this patient has an ostomy. For those of you who don't know what that is "Look it up" Or I have a definition. He had a colostomy to be exact so:

Colostomy
The surgically created opening of the colon (large intestine) which results in a stoma. A colostomy is created when a portion of the colon or the rectum is removed and the remaining colon is brought to the abdominal wall. It may further be defined by the portion of the colon involved and/or its permanence.

In other words your poop goes into a bag that's on your abdomen. Well these bags need to be clean. Thank Goodness my training hasn't taught me how to do that...YET! Well Heidi decides to change the bag. (Just so you are aware there are TWO openings to an ostomy bag. She takes the bag off holds both ends and starts looking for the garbage. she's on the left side of the bed I'm on the right side of the bed. The Garbage is on my side behind me. So she walks around and TOSSES the bag into the garbage with ONE hand. she suddenly forgot that it had two openings. The bag literally crosses behind me into the garbage and the poop goes all over the floor. IT misses me by cm's. If I stepped back at all I would be stepping in it. And than the smell, it reeked. IT smelt so bad we could hardly breathe. So Heidi and I start laughing because it was such a close call. we finally get it all cleaned up, get the patient all cleaned up and than we left the room laughing histerically because we could have gotten poop all over us.

Ok there is one of my many nursing stories. Trust me there will be more in the next four years and than some!!

"Mouth wide Open"

Ok, so I was just messing around seeing what everyone got. And well I tried this one:

Kyla LOVES Bryan

10000 1000 100

Love Level: 100%

Name 1:
Name 2:

Loves-O-Meter
From Go-Quiz.com


Wow...

Is it me??

Your Expression Number is 9

An idealist and humanitarian, you strive to make the world a better place. You do your best when you follow your feelings and sense of compassion. Deep down, you dream of being loved by many. You are capable of much human understanding and have a lot to give to others. While you are very ambitious, you never lose site of perspective. You have an abundance of creative talents... you just need to tap into them. Although you are a giving person, you can become selfish if you are ignored. If you are not able to help people, you tend to shelf your talents. Without others, you become aloof and start to lack sensitivity.

What's Your Expression Number?

Night Shift

Hey just wanted to give you guys an update about what i"ve been doing, since I haven't seen you or anyone for that matter in the past four days. I've done my first rotation at the hospital. I've just finished my second night, and well I'm going to sleep soon. I'm hungry though so I'm getting breakfast. Than I'm crawling into mom's bed shutting the door, and SLEEPING!!

night!

Short but Sweet

Ok so I don't have much to say...I'm tired...my feet hurt (because big boss came into the store today) and I'm not sure what else I was going to say.

I start work at the hospital on Pallative Care on Saturday, funny huh? Starting on the weekend.

So there are officially Two movies I want to see...wait three movies:

Star Wars Episode 3 (I missed when you guys went remember)
The Sisterhood of the traveling pants (Girl movie, but that's ok cause I'm a girl)
Mr and Mrs Smith (well it looks cool)

So I'm pating for gas in the blue car cause well I'm like the only one who drives it anymore. I'm real lucky, I get the car that has TWO broken doors and sounds like a cat is stuck in the muffler. But it's a vehicle, I have some freedom from my family because of this vehicle!

ok I really need to go to bed now. My bro wants me to get up at 8 and drive hime to school, I promised I would...that's what a great sister I am!

Independence...

is a beautiful thing. If only I had it! I seriously consider moving out and living on my own, but than I consider how much it would cost to do that. That's when reality kicks in and I'm like, I can't afford that!!! eeep! No independence is a precious thing and those of you who have it and can walk all over your parents like some people do are extremely lucky.

But than again, i don't ever want to treat my parents like a bank who are just around to drive me places and let me live in their house, but yet I would treat it like my house! It just wouldn't be right. But if I had my own place I could stay out as late as I want, go where I wanted, not worry about other people, clean my room when I actually had time, and when there was a mess in my house I know I would have been the one to make it, and I wouldn't fell grumpy about cleaning it because well it's my mess! Plus my parents couldn't tell me I had to come home because I had a BAD attitude. Am I not allowed to have some weird days where I can get my own way??

Ok I'm done with bad mouthing my parents, I do love them very much, and I do appreciate them letting still stay in their house while I'm going to school and whatnot. They could kick me out if they wanted to! but it's my parents I don't think they would ever do that, atleast I hope they wouldn't do that?

So tonight was fun, youth was at Ryan's house (Ryan Hughes). Girls only night, and the guys were at the Breau's place! It was cool, it was total girl talk with FOOD! That's always the way it should when girls get together, there will be lots of talking laughter and food. And sometimes there can even be some crying. But in the end it all works out and things are revealed that no one should EVER know! EVER, EVER!!

ok so this is a little serious guys sorry! But I know you'll still read it cause you love me!!

Chao
Jocelyn

Gilmore Girls

Now the reason I chose this title is because I am watching Gilmore Girls right at this moment. It's an old episode, but I like it!

What to say? What to say? It is either very late a night right now, or very early in the morning. Depending on who you are! I'm going with late at night because I haven't gone to sleep yet! In all honesty I can't sleep, I have so much on my mind! But the thing is I don't know what is on my mind? There is just so many situations and things going on, I can't decide what one thing I'm thinking about or even that one thing that is making me anxious!

These past few nights as I'm climbing in bed I get this really anxious feeling in my gut! I feel as if my stomach is continuely turning over, but what makes it worse is I have no idea what could be causing it. But than again a lot of things could be causing it!

I think if maybe I write it out, I won't feel so tied up inside! And the ulcer that seems to be growing won't kill me before my time!

1. I'm working, working really hard for Reitman's I'm not the best at it, but I really really try hard, but sometimes it's still not good enough! You have to really sell yourself in this job! that means selling the clothes saying the right thing, pushing your product...that's a lot of pressure, I've only worked there a little over a month and it's still hard, I thought it would get much easier by this time?

2. My new job! this I think is what would cause the ulcer! I'm am terrified of this new job. I have no idea what is expected of me, I have no idea if my skills are good enough for what they need. I haven't been able to get a hold of anyone to get my reference letter from yet, as well I haven't been able to get my health and pysical document thingy yet either! Which is due Wednesday. Plus i have to photocopy a bunch of other things as well, including my high school diploma! I don't know if I'll have this all ready for the 8th!

3. Coordinating between old job and new job. Scheduling sucks! I don't know if I'll have the energy to do both jobs, get enough sleep or even enough food to sustain me for both jobs and between both jobs. I can't be working a shift at the hospital while working a shift at Reitman's. I can't be in two places at once!!!

4. The end of summer. I know this seems far away but I'm anxious for it because the end of summer means a lot of things, Friends going away, other friends coming back, starting school again (which means studying again) Organizing events for the Nursing Society! That's just a bucket of I don't know what it's a bucket of but it's just no fun!!

5. Church. Now I know that seems like a weird kind of thing that would cause stress but it really has. What with a new youth pastor and having changes happen. Change can be hard to handle. Plus I forgot how much I missed teaching sunday school, but I can't teach right now because of work! Work actually schedules me for a lot of sunday's!!

There it's all out in the open, and those of you who checked to day and are like...why is the time like 2 in the morning, because that is the time when I first wrote this, than it got erased some how!!! Talk about bad luck, so I wrote it all over again. So this is the second version of my Horrible ulcer creating LIFE!!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...eee...eee..ee.e..*cough*..*gasp*
sorry I ran out of air :)

yeah, there is way to musch sugar in my system. I left work way to happy today...why I have no clue! I'm just doing what I'm doing relaxing, blogging, playing freecell. Oh and listening to music! So my chest is still burnt, it's no longer a tomato red It's almost a bright pick now, so I would call it cotton candy pink. yup!

So I got my hair done yesterday! It's all pretty and colored and nicely cut now, my mother no longer tells me that I have to do something with my hair cause well I did!

I finished the book now...not the book, but I finished The sisterhood of the traveling pants. Kind of impressed with the book. I now would like to see the movie. It lookes cute...Yes I did say cute, but it's sad too. It's all about growing up, and living with the reallity of being a teenage girl and the survival of a friendship through it all! (Yet that all takes place in one summer)

My fingers feeling better, It no longer hurts to touch any part of the finger, now it's just where the pin when through that hurts. Yay no more pain, I seriously can not take pain for myself, if I have to do anything that involves pain I will not be able to do it...Well I guess that means no children. Sorry mom you won't get any grand children from me!! (except through adoption that I could suffer through!)

So I have no idea if I'm working next week or not, well I know I'm working at Reitman's if that helps. but I have no idea, if I'm working at the hospital, maybe i can arrange it that I don't start there until Monday! maybe she'll be reasonable about that. She does know I have a part-time job! The nurse manager, she wouldn't do something crazy like book me on thursday! would she?? I'm so worried! Hopefully God will take pity on me and have everything work out!

Well tonight I am going out which means I will have to shower!! yup shower I do that sometimes, get myself prettied up! ;) NIGHT ALL!

The wonderful life of ME

So I had more telephone conversations in one hour this morning than I've had all week. So I now have a new job. I'm actually going to be working in the hospital now! I'm going to be on 3B N or S. I forget now, but it's Pallative Care. Yes, I know, tough summer job, but it'll be the experience of a lifetime, especially at this age! I have to call and email some people but it will get worked out in the end. I had to call and cancel with the daycare. I felt extremely bad. Mom gave me the suggestion of giving them someone else's name to offer them. I think i will and see what comes out of it. I have no idea how Reitman's will react bt we'll see what happens when it all hits the fan. I seriously feel like I'm slowly headed towards a fan and I'm going to be shredded to pieces when I hit it! That's how mixed up and scared I feel.

Well, I"m burnt from laying out in the sun yesterday with Linny, but of all places that is burnt it had to be my chest! yeah, bright red! Doesn't get any better than this!

So I'm at Kyla's house, We're having diner, Kyla's actually cooking! Yes, I said Kyla! (Look your name three times in one sentence) Linny's working, so I feel for her wish I could come get you and take you away from that aweful place. But I can't if I was a millionaire, I'd hire you to come work for me, I'm not sure what you would do for me yet, Probably organize my room, what do you think Lin?

So yes, I was talking about where I am right now! At Kyla's. I'm not sure what we'll do tonight but it will be fun, amusing even. I'll tell you tommorow what we did! Have a good night everyone.

So much to say but not sure how to say it?

So as my title says I think i have a lot to say. Tonight (Well today really) was beautiful weather wise. I came home and couldn't wait to go outside, so I called up the girls and we went for a walk. Kyla found a short cut and was at the house faster than any of us expected. So we walked all over the neighborhood and talked pretty much the whole time, unless we were going up a steep hill we had to stop talking so we could breathe. It was good exercise but than we destroyed all our work by going to my house and eating Ice Cream, but really who could say no to Ice Cream.

so interesting thing happened while we were downstairs talking we were laughing and I sit my hand against the sofa arm to make a point and I jammed a needle into my finger. Yeah, that hurt. it wasn't even the sharp end that went in It was the eye of the needle. Great huh? Well I took it out, calm as can be, and well Kyla's looking at it the whole time. She saw it go in and she saw it come out, she started to cry. If I'm dying Kyla, I do not want you at my bedside! Yeah it was nothing, but now it hurts, If I pick anything up in my right hand (dominate hand) same hand the needle went into, there is pain in my finger, not just in the spot that the needle went into, but the whole bottom part of my finger. So now everyone can say Way to go, because it was the smartest thing I've done in a while! (that was sarcasm is case you missed it)

We than walked Kelley to her house and Ky, Lin and I went to the golden arches. I didn't anything there, but Ky got supper and Lin got more Ice Cream totally understandable cause it's ice cream. it seriously felt like old times when we used to walk at night, and than talk. We spent atleast an hour Lin and I standing by the side of the road just talking, and I remember when we used to do that all the time.

I feel as if we got something back that was missing this past year, It was simply our friendship. All of us got our friendship back. I'm all most worried about what's going to happen come September. Will we go back to being selfish and not caring about what's happening with others. I know for certain I do not want to go through that first year again. It's really tough, not just the work but your social life takes a huge beating as well.which is why I really like doing things now, with everyone, even with new people I like hanging out with them to!

So I'm reading the sisterhood of the traveling pants, and well I really like it. Kyla sugestes that the girls do something like that. Well, since in all honesty we are not going to get an article of clothing to fit all four of us, we decded to do a traveling journal. Simply we'd have one entry each and once that entry was done you would have to send it off to the next person, whether we'll be in order or not all depends. I have a few journal books in my room right now, I'm going to take a look and next time the girls are together just us, I will bring it out. And we'll have to decide the rules of the journal. It'll be easy enough to write them in the journal itself.

Well I have new jeans which makes me happy cause I've been living without a pair of jeans for some time now, and i love wearing jeans, at home and when we are out, it's just so comfy. so now I have Jeans!! Yay! Can you feel my excitement coming off the computer screen. Admit it Kyla I know you can feel it!

ok, right now, I'm reading my devotions in ephesians, take a look into that chapter it's good read. I think any reading of the bible is a good read, it's hard to read sometimes, but once you get the hang of it, it can become your guide.

I'm not working tommorow, or thursday, I have to pick up my Criminal record though on either one of those days. It's for the daycare center! You know, Making sure I'm not some sort of criminal who shouldn't be working with Children. But condsidering I have no record I'm not to worried! I don't even have a speeding ticket! I better not say that, next thing I know, I'll get one!

Since I'm getting tired now, and you are probably bored out of your mind by well what I said up there. I will finish with my declaration of ...


NEED SLEEP!

I've come to rely on sleep, I don't know what it's going to be like as soon as I have to be somewhere for 8 am some morning I really enjoy sleeping in, and even if I was working in the morning, i still wouldn't get up till 8:30, an extra hour does wonders for the system! Ok Good Night I'm getting that well needed sleep. Youth is tommorow night I want to look well rested. NOT! I could go to youth in my pj's and no one would notice. I'm really going now! BYE

Bryan

Here's yours...sorry it took so long

1.Bryan is a tall, star wars freak (that is not a bad thing) who is attending St.Thomas
2. anything by the barenaked ladies like another postcard The song is funnyit's totally your style.
Movie-Oceans 11 favorite movie I saw with you.
3. 4 am when everything is quiet and asleep just like you
4. Respectful
5. hmm, there's been many, but two stick out in my mind, Our date to celebrate our one year, and our break up. I would never forget those events.
6. A turtle, hard on the outside but soft and squeashy on the inside
7. If you hated me after we broke up?

Lindsay

1. Met Lindsay in Grade 7, talked to her on the phone before I even met her, she is going to do something amazing with her life, she's just not sure what it is yet. Plus she is the biggest Country fan and I"m proud of her for it!
2. Two songs I'll be and Does He love you-Reba McEntire (If I spelled that wrong my life is hanging in the balance) I bet you know why ;)
Movie: Ever After because we could recite it to each other at one point in our lives.
3. 5 o'clock time for food and relaxed atmosphere
4. Loyal
5. Many memorable moments, Walking together and having to climb over a fence, crying together. One christmas when that present came that you didn't want--I hit my head on the candle that night.
6. Eagle-brave and beautiful soars far above the rest and craves adventure.
7. whether we'll still be friends 40 years down the road.

Weird Things are Happening

So weird things have been happenning, especially over the weekend!

I spent Friday night at Lin's house, where we watched Emperor's New Groove and Muppets Wizard of Oz...yeah that was interesting! Kyla and I slept over than we went to Kyla's house, and talked, I think the girls should refrain from taking for atleast a week cause it feels like we got everything out...but I know for a fact it was probably just the tip of the Iceberg! Good thing there is no big boat coming or else we might crash and all die...jk!

Well tommorow is a holiday, I'll sleep in get some well needed rest, but in all honesty I think I got the best sleep ever at Lindsay's house Friday night, I've never felt so refreshed. Tonight I'm going to church, we'll see Pastor Matt and Laura tonight it's fun to talk with them. We'll see how they'll fit in, I think they'll work out really well.

Well that's all I had to say...oh and Bryan thanks for the apology! I forgive you! Just don't do it again!

Chao amigos

Kelley

1. Kelley is going to be a Liscesed practical nurse come December! WOW
2. Inside of You-by John Schilt (Do you remember)
Inside of you, Theres a heart full of dreams, Like the gold in a stream to be uncovered
Inside of you lies a soul made to shine theres a child meant to fly and discover all the wonders God can do inside of you
3. 8 o'clock bright and chipper...yikes
4. Honest
5. Most memorable...??? Coming back from camp many times, or going to Czech together, and praying with you.
6. A poodle...and that's a compliment cause you know how much I love poodles.
7. If you realize that no matter what you do, or what you say, I'll be there...that's what friends do.

Kyla

1. Kyla is a film student at Humber college
2. Fight Club...she's as zany as that movie...plus she's the one who introduced me to the movie
3. Midnight 12 o'clock, Fun time, but not too wild that you are not aware of what is going on.
4. Creative--yup creative or bonkers, but I think creative is a nicer way to say it
5. Lately there have been a lot of memorable moments, late night talking, sleeping over at your house on an air matress, Waxing our legs on your suggestion :P
6. White tiger--Gorgeous, and enjoys being in the spotlight
7. If you'll still talk to me when you make it big! ;)

This is from Kelley!

Which is from Kate, but it still works!!

01. Reply with your name and I will write something about you.
02. I will then tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
03. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, it would be...
04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you.
05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you.
06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of.
07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you.
08. Put this in your journal. (optional)

Ok, Now reply, or click on the add comment link and I'll write something about you!! I'll be nice I promise!!

Star Wars...I missed you!!

Yes, I know I'm very upset at myself! I went on Wednesday to buy tickets and well they were sold out...Than I found out today that Donovan stood in line and was able to get tickets that night for the show!!! GRRR! No I am not bitter It just means one of you will have to see it again in theatres...Does anyone want to volunteer??? I swear I'm a good date, I'll even pay for my own ticket! So I hear it was really good...duh!!

Well anyway, I'm looking for anooither job now because well my hours have been cut back exponentially, I had been working atleast 20 hrs a week and next week I am scheduled to have 7.5 hrs. Yup, I can't live off of that!! No I can't so now I'm looking for a day job or something I'll still keep the Reitman's job, but I'll ask to work nights and weekends if I get another job!

I stayed home last night and had the pleasure of watching the CSI finally, yes it was very good, I was on the edge of my seat. All I say is WOW!!

Well I'm going out tonight, over to Linny's what we will be doing, beats me. But I like seeing my friends, they make me forget all the bad things in my life...Which consist of minimal bad things, but still there are some bad things!! Ok now i'm not making any sense.

We now Have a new Youth Pastor...MATT PALMER and his wife LAURA! Now there is a funny coincidence...I know Matt, We grew up in the same home church Sunset Pentecostal church. yup, rather funny huh??

ok so this weekend should be rather slow but we'll see what happens!~

See you tonight if you are going to Linny's

Bras that do not fit!

Well, I'm terribly sorry I have not written in over a month but well I've been busy...but that's my excuse for everything. So now I am making time. So here we go...

UPDATE:

I'm working at Reitman's, yup, but I'm looking for another job as well that way I'll have two jobs and I'll be able to well pay for University yet still spend money during the year. I know it sounds crazy.

So you know how I was like, I'm going to tell him, I really am, I going to do it! Well I didn't so everyone is now officially able to call me a chicken. He went back to the place he's at and I'm still here, still being a chicken yet still having feelings. I almost wish in a way I could just get over him and let it go. Maybe that's when something will happen when I don't have feelings for him anymore!

Well I went shopping this weekend many times, I bought well many things including three bras. Which I'm still not sure if it fits right. I mean really how are you supposed to get the perfect bra with just enough lift, just enough support it would make shopping ten times easier.

As well this weekend has been messed up. I went out to Kelley's house Saturday night, Than to Nick's house Sunday night and than I had the girls in on Monday night, now tuesday I went out with the girls to the mall, and I am planning to go out with Leif tonight to a movie. Yeah this is the most I've gotten out in like weeks and it's all in one week.

I think I need to disperse some of these activities, I spend less money that way!

Well I got this book It's called "The sisterhood of the traveling pants" Which is being turned into a movie as well which is excellent but I can't wait to read it. I've heard a lot about the book and it seems like a perfect distraction!

Well that's it...I'm thinking I'm going to see Hitchhicker's guide to the galaxy tonight, that should be fun! See Ya

Finished

I am officially finished my very first year of University...I am done exams, now I just get to wait patiently for them on Saturday night after midnight. which I won't I will actually sleep this time and wait and find out come morning what I made. I kind of seems unreal to be done. It's a very nice feeling, but it's kind of scary at the same time because I don't know what to do with myself.

So I now have a job at Reitman's, Yup I'm a reitman's girl. I really do love their clothes and the atmosphere is ten times better. Yes, I'm really glad they offered me a job. It makes me happy. Plus you get so many bonuses when you really think about it, I can get clothes, 50% off. Yes, that means a whole new summer wardrobe for Jocelyn!! Yay!

I've decided tommorow I'm going to the Library...what I'm getting at the library only God knows because I have no clue, I just know I cannot stay in this house one more day. A girls got to get out, she's got to spread her wings, so if it rains tommorow I will not be happy. Well That's it Have a nice day everyone.

STRESS

Ok so I don't really have that much stress, but I figured you'd like to hear about it anyway. I've spent today studying for my final tommorow and I'm still not done. Yeah I know I should of started sooner and it's my own fault, and that I'm taking time from studying to write this but...OH WELL!!

I've also made a descision to try to eat better, stay within my calore range, start running. I have more time now. It should be easier than it was during school...I say should. I don't make any promises, but it's going to be my summer project. Hey I lost 24 pounds before I can do it again.

Advice for anyone who wants to know...Do not tell your mother anything. She will horde it over your head for a century, and when you are trying not to think about things like getting a job, or about romantic relationships she goes and brings them up, when you've finally have put them from your mind so you can STUDY!!! I am not very happy with her. And what's with the fact that I get a job...I real actual job, with shifts and what not and a paycheck...and you know what she wants me to do--get another job. Ok MOM I'll get right on that!!! gggrrrrrr! Atleast give me a little time to study and let my mind relax before bringing stuff up that I don't want to think about!!

Yes so I do have a job now, it's nice to know that people want to hire me. As well I got a call today for another interview, but this would be in retail as well actually to the store directly next to the store I got hired at. Yeah wouldn't that be funny.

All right I'm finished ranting. I've wasted enough of my studying time to put towards this lovely subject. Thanks for "listening".

My Birthday...was yesterday...

Ok I meant to blog yesterday...but I said I'll do it at the end of the day. Well as you can see I didn't.

Yesterday was an interesting day. It was a normal day at the beginning. People called every now and than to wish me a happy birthday (Thank you everyone)!!

Dad came home and brought an Ice Cream cake with him. It was rimmed in pink with a huge pink flower in the middle and It said Happy Birthday Jocelyn! in PURPLE!!! Yes in purple. Exciting huh??

Well anyways I was going about studying (I was actually studying this time). When I got a phone call from Ryan (who is in Newfoundland) wishing me a happy birthday. Wasn't that nice. We talked and I went to bed when we hung up.

That's it...That's how I spent my birthday. Thanks again to everyone who called and sent e-mails or messenged me. I really appreciate your love and affection.

Now I'm going to go eat some Ice Cream cake...It's mine after all isn't it???

Tommorow...Tommorow...I'll love ya...Tommorow

It's only a day away.

Breaking out in song should be a way of life. To live life in a musical. I find since I saw Joseph I tend to sing, dance, and well just have fun randomly. Everything can be made into a song in a musical. Take for instance the splinter in my foot. That would be made into a song about how painful it is and how It hurts to walk.

I think my favorite musical song is Defying Gravity from the musical Wicked. But it's only the second musical I want to see I absolutely want to see Hairspray. Yup when I get the chance those are the two musicals that I want to see. When I will get to see them. I don't know, but... I will see them.

Ok, so tommorow is my Birthday...I'm not excited or anything. Yes I turn 19 but that is all. It's not like I'm going to use the fact that I am legally able to drink now and able to buy cigarettes. These two things do not interest me. You'd think there would be something good about turning 19, but really you're still a teenager on the brink of Young adulthood. Wanting to celebrate a milestone (which it really isn't if you think about how many more years you have) but really having nothing to celebrate. Well I'm a big junky for birthdays. I know I always usually make a big deal out of them. But you know what...It's different this year.

All I really wanted for my birthday, was an ice cream cake to go with supper. That's my only request. I don't care if all my friends forget, or if I don't get any presents, All I want is a birthday cake. I guess this is a sign of maturity! LOL HA...That even made me laugh. Maturity yeah right!

Well as you can tell I do not have any plans for my birthday...but I'll tell you all about it tommorow.

Tommorow...Tommorow...I'll Love ya...Tommorow

Secret

I have a secret to tell, don't worry it's not someone else's secret, it's my own. I have a crush! Yes I know it sounds like a pathetic secret and some of you all ready knew this secret but it's still important because there have been new events and new descisions that have been made.

Now where to start...first off I'm not sure if this is really just a crush. That's how it started anyway, like a crush. Than over time of getting to know this person I started wishing I could spend more time with this person, and thinking about him at odd times. Wondering what he was doing, or wondering how he was doing. Wondeing if he was sad, if he was happy and if he a good day or a not so good day. I started looking forward to hearing from him, or taking to him.
A while ago I decided that I would tell (which I still haven't done) but....

Than these past few months conversations just stopped he was busy, I was busy, and I began thinking maybe it was just a crush, maybe I'm just making things up in my own head. Maybe I need to pray some more! Which is what I do whenever I think about this guy. I pray. Not for him to like me or to want a relationship with me. I pray for his well being. I really honestly care about him, and that's what scares me. I'm scared I let myself get to attached or to involved. I'm let my emotions get the better of me. And I think that's what scares me the most, is I can't control my emotions.

I can't control the huge grin that crosses my face whenever someone brings him up. I can't stop the flutter in my stomach whenever I see an e-mail from him, I can't stop the feeling of my heart squeezing whenever I talk to him. I just can't! But that's the way God made us. Emotions and all.

Well anyway, yesterday, I had decided that it's time to give up this crush. I prayed and felt a bit better I thought I had made the right descision, after all we hadn't talked in over two months. And than yesterday afternoon guess who I talked to. Yup I know, hard to believe the same day I was contemplenting giving up this crush or whatever it is, I talk to him, and he remembered my birthday. I'll call it devine intervention. So I've come to the conclusion. That I'm going to tell him. It will be hard and I might chicken out, but you only get a few chances before they're all gone.

I'll tell you what happens! It won't be for another few weeks so don't hold your breath and be checking everyday to see what happens. Just pray for me! And pray that I'll have the courage to go through with it. If not I could always let him read this blog!

Interview!!

A s some of you may know...I had an interview yesterday. It was well interesting. The interview was up in Fredericton at the department of education building. So at 6 o'clock I was up, and getting showered and than nicely put together (meaning: I had on my new clothes, my hair was done AND I had make up on) We were out the door by 7 am, Hard to believe you get on the road that early. Well we made it to the building on time (we thought for a little bit that we weren't going to make it) And I go in, introduce myself to the receptionist, and went and sat down with two other people waiting to get into the interview. We had a group interview. Yup there were four of us in total being interviewed at the same time. They went through each one of us and asked interview questions. Than they got us to do our presentations. (I went first, didn't want anyone doing theirs and totally scaring me)

Than we did a group project...ever here the one about crashing on the moon and having only 15 supplies and you have to put them in order. yeah, that was interesting. Then we had to do it as a group...yup. I'm not kidding. An interesting interview, and a learning experience to say the least.

But it wasn't all bad, the people I had the interview with were really nice and it would be really cool to work with them again.

It seems I'm seeing job opportunities left and right...I went in to Reitman's last night and dropped off a resume, they're doing interviews for a part-time employee next week. So we'll see what happens there.

As well, I have a interview today with Kennebec Manor, For a summer student position. I don't know if they want first year students or not, but...It was worth a shot, if I get it, I get it! If not, atlease I tried.

Well that's it...only one more day not including today of classes, than I have some morestudying to do for finals...all I really wish for right now--Is a GOOD night's sleep. I feel like I haven't been sleeping these past few days. I'm ready for a night where I don't wake up in the middle of the night to hear a cup crash ( I knocked my glass of water that was on my desk to the floor it shattered) Than Being up late practicing my speech, than not baing able to sleep because so many possiblilities are going through my mind. But even worse is having to get up at 6am the next morning (the earliest I wake up is 6:30) a half hour really does wonders for your system. Than last night I went to sleep maybe a t midnight (not smart to begin with, but *shrugs* it happens) I kept feeling hot than cod, than hot so I went to sleep with just a sheet, than I wake up in the middle of the morning (3am) feeling freezing cold. I put all the blankets on me and my sleep is resumed and I'm in lala land. Next thing I know I hear my father yelling at me to get up, and when I get up, I wake with a massive headache. Yup, I want just one night of sleep that is not interupted!!! And one morning where I'm not awakened rudely!!!

It'd be nice...but it's a dream!

ok chao amigos...Have a good day.

6 days (count down till April 13)

The Butterflies are going crazy...

Well, I'm here to talk about a guy who makes your heart go pitter patter. And well that guy would be Ryan Gosling.
Ryan Gosling who is 25, not to old for a girl turning 19. I mean really he is quite gorgeous those sultry eyes, those gorgeous golden locks. Makes butterflies turn in my stomach. And if you think I'm talking craziness just watch the notebook...I know that it was just his character in a movie but any guy who can say things like that and look good doing it is okay in my book. So therefore Ryan Gosling is a catch...and well a celebrity crush, but I deserve one of those every now and than. So the beautifully handsome Ryan, deserves this place of honor...hey Lindsay will agree with me and say he's very cute as well, as will Kyla and Kelley. We love guys that can look into a camera and feel like he's looking deep into your soul.

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Now don't tell me you can't fall in love with a face like that.

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I mean really look at those eyes, don't you just want to drown in them.

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There goes the butterflies again!

My New Hair

A better view of my new hair
Originally uploaded by godsgirljml.

So this is my new hair. What do you think?? I even have bangs. You can't really see them cause they're underneath all that hair. But they are there trust me. I almost cried in the hair dresser's chair when she first cut them. but than I was fine. You'll have to see it in person.

SEX

Now that I have your attention.

Did you ever notice how in classes or in regular conversations that people assume that all teens are having sex. They assume that once you hit a certain age that atleast once in your life you have been pissed drunk. They assume that you've experimented with drugs and if you say no they're like well atleast pot. I am here to inform you that it's not true. There are some peole out in the world who do not do those things and it really ticks me off when someone will say "oh they're all going to have sex anyway" NOT true. Not everyone is haveing sex or drinking their minds empty, some people have morals and ethics that they want to maintain and uphold. Like not having sex till their married. It does exist and no offense to me I'd think it'd make the marriage better if you waited. There would be no surprises like getting pregnant accidently and than not knowing who the father is. Not a smart thing. Or contracting an STI you know most STI's can be lifelong. Meaning they are not cured. Ok I'm done. I guess I'm just innocent and I never realized how many people ARE having sex. I guess I'm in a minority. But if you think about it...what guy would want his wife to have been with someone else???

I think the above rant came from finding out a friend got pregnant. Yeah, dropped out of school and went back home and now she's pregnant?? That's what happens when you're not careful and when you don't wait.

Ok now I'm really done, I had something else I wanted to mention but I don't remember.

I do know that I'm now getting a car for next year, well maybe depending on, how much I can save from working or how much I get from scholarships. And all depending is how much I can take for a student loan. And if everything works out, that means a vehicle for me! But than I will have to pay for gas too. That means maintaining a job, yup. A job.

My Adventure

Sorry I haven't blogged as much but here I go...I have many things to say to catch you all up!!

First off--let's start with Easter. Friday as you probably know we went to Nick's. It was very fun. We did things we've never done before TALK!!! Well yeah we talk all the time but the things we discussed. Like the best way to work out...cause Rick is all pumped up now. We danced showed our best moves persay, and we talked about drinking alcohol. We weren't drinking but we talked about it. It wasn't complete though too, we were missing a few people, like Kyle, Kyla, and well I was missing Ryan cause well I think I just got used to him being there whenever I hung out with the group. But it was still an awesome night. Andrew seemed shocked still that I could drive, Bryan was confused about my lovelife, and everyone laughed and joked. Just like any other time huh?

Now than the Saturday my parents left for moncton and My brother and I were left to fend for our sleves that day and all through the night cause they didn't come home till well Sunday afternoon. That meant my Easter was a little strange not to mention I had to work that sunday as well. It was quite interesting. Made me realize how much I was actually missing from work. You start getting used to the people and knowing names...And than all the newbies come in!!! aaahhhhhhhhhh!!! Makes you feel really old!! I've been working officially at the Aquatic Center for 4 years! Well anyways on with my Easter story I got home at 3 o'clock and me still thinking I was getting anything for easter...and guess what is on the table.

-a small bag of chocolate eggs
-A large chocolate bunny
-some hair elastics (essentials when swimming and doing clinical)
-A scrapbooking album
-Some scrapbooking stckers
and
-a smaller bunny with Krackle crispies in it (it tasted good)

That night was than Easter diner with the family (Grammy and Grampy Estey). I feel more grown up know while at these family functions. I no longer sit at the kids table!! It's a new feeling! I am an adult!!

Well that was my easter to weekend but I have an even better story to tell you:

I'm calling it *The Water Adventure*

So yesterday I went to school, did my lab was finished around 11 am. I than traveled with Patti all the way to Saint Joseph's hospital to go and show our stretching video. (that was an interesting endeavor ask me about it someitme). The nurses laughed and we wanted to get out of there as fast as we could. So we than decided to go to Swiss Chalet for lunch (it was delicious btw) I only spent 10 dollars! (that's a good thing the rest of them had their bills at 20$) Well on our way back to the University we are driving down McAlister Drive and well you know how it was raining for like 24 hrs straight and there was giant puddles forming on the road. And well we're driving and Patti is like it's only a little water and thinking we've cleared the area that was really deep we just drive and ass we are going through the water and it is coming up and going over the hood and windsheild and the engine stalls. Yup we are on the road in the middle of a giant puddle. People are driving by us watching us, not stopping to ask if we need help or anything. LIterally we waited for fifteen minutes (laughing our butts off) and only one car stopped to help us.

That One person that helped were two young guys trying to be all tough and mighty, oh it's your battery, all you need is a boost. We kind of laughed because everything was working. The radio and lights were all working. (So we knew it wasn't the battery) But we thought it was funny that they wanted to help. So they drive up along the curb, get a little wet and by a little I mean a lot, while we are nice and cozy in the car. yes, we laughed because it was not the battery is was in fact the engine got filled with water. (the exhaust pipe was under water and everytime we'd try to start the car we would bring more water in to it. ) So we got a tow to Patti's dealer, than got a taxi to Sonja's car and than we finally got back to the University. We than decided just to go down to the hospital. (Because that's were Patti's meeting was and Aunt Liz was working and was planning to drive me home so I figured might as well meet her) I got to see the Family medicine floor. It was cool. I think that is where we are working come fall, or we are working in the other one, but I'm pretty sure it's that Family Medicine.

Well so that's it, I have nothing more to say. Except night and I love you all!!!

Chao